Virtually every client I see is in some way suffering from low self-confidence or self-esteem issues.
Feelings of not being good enough? Or being relentlessly hard on themselves? They often set perfectionist standards for themselves that are virtually impossible to achieve? Not to mention stressful and exhausting!
These issues often stem from childhood. Negative things that people have said to us or about us; friends, parents, siblings, or even our impressions from TV/social media that we are just “not good enough”? That we will never amount to anything? These words and thoughts can gnaw away at us over the years and create a pattern of negative thinking about who we are, what we can do and what we should expect.
"You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection”
A lack of self-worth or confidence can massively impede our progress through life and can be crippling. It’s heartbreaking to think that people aren’t living to their full potential simply down to a relentless negative self-dialogue that originates in the thoughtless and hurtful comments of others.
The great news is that we can change the way we talk to ourselves. During therapy, we will be exploring what you are good at. Identifying activities, people and dreams that make you feel alive and happy. We will also rebuild your sense of self-worth and confidence so that you feel strong enough to eliminate or radically reduce interactions with the people and things in your life that bring you down.
We will re-establish boundaries and build your confidence. You will be more assertive and will spend your time with the people you enjoy doing the things that you love. As your confidence and self-worth soar, you will continue to develop your relationships, career, and interests to a new level and feel good about yourself again. The power of negative external influences will have diminished enormously as you rely on internal resources to build your sense of happiness and self-worth.
One of the easiest and most effective tools in re-establishing your boundaries is simply learning to say ‘no’. ‘No’ is a short but complete sentence. Learn to say no to things, people, events and ‘commitments’ that sap your joy and energy and waste your valuable time. If your self-worth has been low for years then many people will have been treating you as a doormat. Time to set things straight.
Improvements happen quickly and I really enjoy seeing people reinventing themselves and getting the spring back in their step.